4th
Michael Jackson - P.Y.T. (Pretty Young Thing)
My favorite crazy Michael Jackson fact: this song was the 6th single off of Thriller. That means Michael and his people felt this was only the 6th best song off the album.
Theres a eulogy for you.
I enjoyed the opening cinematic to The Beatles Rock Band game more than all of Across the Universe. Watch it in glorious full resoloution here. It’s by Passion Pictures, who is also responsible for the bulk of the Gorillaz animation.
This game couldn’t go wrong, but Harmonix is doing it right anyway.
Friday saw Jeno Leno finally relinquish the host’s chair of The Tonight Show to Conan O’Brien…only to take over his own brand new show in primetime.
And it saw the release of Pixar’s newest intelligent and moving masterpiece Up…only to also see the release of Dreamworks’ new slate of eight (yes, eight) new movies to be released in the next three and a half years. These movies include a fourth Shrek movie, a third Madagascar movie, and a second Kung Fu Panda movie. There are also two movies based on best-selling childrens books and a movie featuring the voices of two of the biggest entertainers of the last year – Robert Downey Jr. and Tina Fey. (Did I mention that the leads of the last three Pixar movies were voiced by Patton Oswalt, Ben Burtt, and Ed Asner respectively?). These eight new movies will undoubtedly gross roughly a gazillion dollars apiece.
Hey kids, why strive for genius and originality when mediocrity will do just as well?
Not to get all serious, but what is up with rape, everyone? So now there’s new Abu Ghraib photos that President Obama needs to never show the nation because I’ll accidentally see them and then just curl up in a ball. And some of them are of people raping prisoners. Because, that’s a thing? I don’t even KNOW. Look, I’m a lady, and while I’m capable of sexual assault (I mean, technically, you know, I’m not gonna sexually assault anyone), let’s be fair, my gender is not usually raping people. It happens, but statistically, not really. It’s pretty much a dude thing. So. Dudes: what is wrong with you? Why are you doing that? I SORT OF understand how you could be driven to kill someone. I ride the subway. I’ve seen Bill O’Reilly speak. Human urges! But I just don’t get that whole “you know what would be awesome? Sexually humiliating and hurting someone. That would just really hit the evil spot for me right about now.”
I’m starting a new campaign called Rape: Seriously, dude? We’re gonna have posters as soon as I can get a graphic designer involved. Select slogans will include Rape: Why are you like this? and Rape: For GODDAMN REAL? HOW? WHY? These can go in subways in place of those Dr. Z and Freelancers Union ads.
And seriously, please President Obama, reader of this blog, do not let those photos get out, because I only have one pair of eyes and I’m pretty sure they’ll burn right out of their sockets.
ONN - Nation’s Girlfriends Unveil New Economic Plan: “Let’s Move In Together”
Although I’m certain you already saw this it’s just too great not to blog
So I was reading my Entertainment Weekly, enjoying The Must List when, after 4 items, it suddenly ended. I thought, “thats weird, the Must List is usually 10 items long. Oh well, I guess that must be it for this week. I’ll just stop reading this week’s issue now.” Then, just I was about to give up, I noticed this helpful arrow at the bottom of the page. Thank goodness they let me know I was supposed to turn the page, otherwise I would have never been able to find the rest of the feature!
In all seriousness, I have subscribed to EW since I was a freshman in high school. As I fancied myself a pop culture savant it was my Bible for many years. But as a terrific article on the late great website fametracker outlined, EW has fallen a long way from its peak. And that article was written in 2003, at least two redesigns ago. I can read the whole magazine cover to cover now in 30 minutes. And sometimes its so insulting to my intelligence I feel embarrassed to be reading it. If I wanted to make a ridiculously hyperbolic statement (and really, when do I not?) then I would say that reading EW over the past five years has been like watching a good friend slowly die from cancer. Except in this case it’s a cancer of their own making. And I fear its not just EW. It’s all human discourse.
Now if you’ll excuse me I have to go twitter about this.